Sexism

Oh gosh, I really wish I hadn't been made to be thinking about this.

It all was really quite simple. I'm planing on asking someone out tomorrow (I'm nervous, but if it doesn't pan out, it's no big deal), so I asked my ex who is my friend now (because we realized it worked better that way), and who has been around without getting around if you know what I mean. So uh... right. So I asked him yesterday if he had ever asked someone out without really knowing them. He said yeah, he knew someone for 30 minutes then asked them out. Then he was asking me why I asked "Did some guy you barely know ask you out?" "No" and there were one or two more questions until I was like "I'm thinking of asking out someone I only sort of know". And his response was great shock to me. His face got harder, and he said with an almost slightly angry tone "I can't tolerate being asked out by girls. I only let it happen once with Britney, because I'd asked her out first. Girls shouldn't ask guys out, it's not right." And then he freaking left it at that.

There is a reason he's my ex. The way I sorta felt like his object that he forgot about was a major reason. But never before had he been so blatantly sexist. And it makes me wonder if all guys think this, or if it's just him being an asshole. Now, I know most guys wouldn't be so blunt about it, but do a lot of them feel so emasculated by being asked out by a girl, or see girls as sex, or perhaps see them as belonging in the kitchen? It took a few minutes for what he said to sink in, but once it had, I felt like yelling at him. It's the 21st century, is it really so crazy to be asked out by a girl?

I know there will always be sexism, and racism, and classism, and whatever-else-ism, but to hear it coming from somewhere I never expected was jarring.

I hope none of my daughters ever feel like they are worth less than a man. It's a future I can really hope for.

Something less serious later this week!
~Jess the Nerdfighting Band Geek

Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger

Soooooooo..... Hi! Lol.

Righto, so I am editing a video I made yesterday, and should be posting it later tonight, and I drew this awesome picture (pfft, not really =P) and I wrote on it "Thanks to cupid... My heart was stabbed and I lost free will" Yaaaaaay for love!

In actuality, since I last posted I went out with my ex for about 4 days, because I was talked into it, before he dumped me for another girl, which is totally lame... But now I'm past that, and my best guy friend is going to talk to someone for me. So I'll tell you if that goes well.

I've finally caught up on all of my late work except for some chemistry bookwork and then an essay analyzing my AR book, and my 3/4 page quote response on said book. I should mention that double spacing is my frieeeeend? But yeah, basically today after school it was raining, and I didn't want to walk home in that, so I just walked to target, ate me some nummy lunch, then did all of the work I had with me. So now I'm nearly caught up =)

So have you ever listened to lumos flies, then listened to fireflies? I just can't stand fireflies after listening to lumos flies, because the beat is slightly faster, and sounds happier.

Ok, I'm gonna go, because I just want all of this late work to be DONE, and I'm gonna finish editing my video.
~Jess the Nerdfighting Band Geek.
PS: I forgot, I got a haircut yesterday, and got about 25 compliments or more on it today, so that just completely made my day awesome.

Bad week

Hey, are, are you doing ok?
You look kinda sad.
Don't worry, it'll all be OK, I promise *hug*
Just let all the sadness drain away.
I'll be here when you need me.
I promise.

-Jess the Nerdfighting Band Geek

Speed of Sound update.

I'm so bad at this "maintaining a blog thing" xD but let's just walk past my absence instead of focusing on how I should blog more blah blah blah {insert charlie brown adult trombone with a plunger sound}.

Anywhoooooo

I'm in the midsts of talking to my band director about what I should be doing if I'm really serious about being a music education major, because last Tuesday I was telling her how a lot of the schools I'd seen had required piano lessons. Basically I'm between being a French teacher (lots of pros and cons there), a math teacher (major pro: really good at it and enjoy it, major con: it's gonna get harder, and I can't necessarily teach it), and a band director (which I am learning has a lot of cons, but it's been my #1 priority for so long that I'm not sure I can work against it).

I have been putting off writing fanfiction stuff (well I've done some, but nothing major), and courtney still does not have her goodbye dvd. I am such a bad person I swear...

Ah what else????

I'm taking the HSA's right now, which I hate, but it gives me more time to hang out with my friend Aaron, so it's all good. I only have the science stuff. I'm reading Harry Potter from start to finish again. I just got finished with book 4 and have started OotP. I'm also watching fringe from start to finish, currently on episode 4. My AP US test approaches like a speeding bullet (May 7th *sigh*) and I am just not nearly as prepared as I should be.

And finally, I'm back together with my ex (one of the ones I'm friends with), with three understandings. The best of these understandings are that it's going to end when I move and we're back to being friends, and then the other is that he's not allowed to play with my hair during class because that distracts the hell out of me. However, I'm not sure that last one will last, because I swear he has ADD... lol.

Oh and in exchange for me being gone the past couple of weeks I'm going to post what I have written of the That 70s Show/House crossover.

Have a awesometastical day!
~Jess the Nerdfighting Band Geek

My crossover:
I have been Frankie for 27 years now.

Sometimes it’s just so hard to keep within boundaries you make for yourself. I made a lot of boundaries when I was Donna. And I can say that I broke almost every single one. So I made a permanent escape and boundary. I left my apartment in Point Place in the dead of night, leaving Eric alone in that bed, and never came back. Went to New Jersey, changed my name, and started a new life. Permanently.

I met Taylor at a concert. Back when I was more Donna like, and music was still a huge part of my life. Before the blog… I wasn’t a DJ or anything anymore, but I was crazy obsessed with a lot of bands. I’m getting off topic though.

I can’t exactly say why I made my blog. It might have been utter boredom. Perhaps it was a ploy for attention. Or maybe a plea for a support system, which was one of the many things I lost when I left Point Place. But I made it. And now I find myself with a support system of about a hundred people. That should really be all anyone ever needs, shouldn’t it?

But then I can’t explain why I feel so empty.

* * *

Taylor can annoy the crap out of me sometimes.

Overall, I love Taylor. He’s amazing in a lot of ways. But in some ways, he just is annoying. Maybe I blog too much. Maybe I can’t make decisions for myself anymore. I know this already. Get off my back and let me be!

And then the neighbor comes and asks Taylor if we know what time it is. Then he looks at me, and calls the police. Calls the police?

I look in the mirror and see the bruises forming on my face. They hadn’t been there before. Taylor had never laid a hand on me. Not that way. What the hell is going on?

* * *

I have never been in a hospital before.

At least not for myself. I’d gone to the hospital for Kelso plenty of times… The worst was the time he came back from the police academy for the last time. He was almost a cop, with a month left, and he said he was going to go off weed once he was in the police. So we took a heavy hit, and it all ended with Kelso falling off the roof.

Being at the hospital is strange. An IV, terrible food, a catheter, and so much more. I blog about it all. Taylor couldn’t be more annoyed.

And that's all I've got on that so far. But I was looking through my stuff and I'm also writing two stories, one that I have no plot for other than it involves starbucks, two teenagers, and new york. The other is about a post nuclear war over oil and water and food girl who wants to see rain, and her quest to see it. So maybe I'll post those later one when I need to make another apology lol.

My Favorite Things

Soooooooo...

Hi!

I just had a pretty awesome day. I saw a bird fly into a glass window (second time this year). I hung out with my best friend, I was indoctrinated into being a french horn player in class (halfway), and I spent the majority of my music lessons today working on music theory instead of musicality. A few of my lesson assignments: Sing this etude I've had for a while but can't get a few intervals, listen to the entire 1 1/2 hour long New World Symphony without any distraction (which is my favorite symphony), and write out the circle of fifths scales and then change the scales to two types of minors (I forgot which ones). It was a pretty awesome day for lessons. Oh, and I made a video response to Dan Brown about god. It's already posted, but it hasn't been processed enough for me to be able to post it as a response yet.

So the being a french horn player in class halfway... Basically I could be switched completely, except the other player in my class just got braces, and he's already a lazy ass so she needs me on harder songs. The songs more focused on musicality I will be playing on horn, because they are easier. So in the end, I'm playing horn in class that isn't crazy difficult for someone in their first year of playing, and at the same time, avoiding playing tuba on the songs that bore me to death. WOO HOO!

A bit of randomness. Have you ever looked closely at the lyrics of panic at the disco's "Build God, then We'll talk"?

Focus on this part:
Raindrops on roses and the girls in white dresses
And sleeping with the roaches and taking best guesses
At the shade of the sheets and before all the stains
And a few more of your least favorite things.

And realize that it's a shout out to the sound of music's song "My Favorite Things":
Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens
Bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens
Brown paper packages tied up with string
These are a few of my favorite things

The little things are what make the world awesome =)
- Jess (Bob) the Nerdfighting Band Geek

PS: Bob is an inside joke with my friends

Conversations on Omegle

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Stranger: hi

You: Hi

Stranger: asl

You: 16 female, a country. asl?

Stranger: 18 male usa

Stranger: what country are u from

You: an undisclosed location

Stranger: ok

Stranger: do u wanna talk dirty to me

You: Ok, what is with this site and pervs? Please be honest here.

Stranger: idk
Your conversational partner has disconnected

* * *

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Stranger: hi!

You: Hi

Stranger: what's up?

You: the ceiling

You: you>

You: ?

Stranger: I'm pretty sure the same haha

You: That's amazing. We have so much in common! lol

Stranger: haha yeah!like we both have a roof over our heards!so amazing!and we;re both on the computer!

You: OMG that's two things. Do you have a nose?

Stranger: yes!!!i can't believe it!!!do you have eyes?!

You: yes!!! We have to be twins or something! What about ears?

Stranger: yes!wow!!!probably!what about hands???

You: Totally! What about clothes?

Stranger: yes!!wb legs??

You: YES YES YES YES YES!!! Now, do you own shoes?

Stranger: yes!!do you have a computer?!

You: we already went throught that one =P Remember, we're talking via the internet... wait a minute, do you have internet? Cuz I definitely do

Stranger: haha wow yeah

Stranger: hmmm hb a chair??

You: definitely have a chair. This is amazing. This is like newsworthy I tell you! We should tell the world

Stranger: yes we should!I will go tell the world now!!!!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

* * *

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Stranger: guy looking for girl to cam2cam with!

You: girl looking for guy who isn't a perv!
You have disconnected

* * *

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Stranger: Hi, im Male, 18, bisexual and looking for some fun with a female or a gay guy. - cam X cam

You: Hi, im female 16, a zombie, and I do not do video appearances
You have disconnected

* * *

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You: Hi, I'm a zombie interested in brains

Stranger: um loser, do you have a life?

You: Yeah I do. What about you? I see that you also find yourself on the same website, and you're not a zombie. Zombie is at least a detail

You: you on the other hand

You: only appear annoying

You have disconnected.

* * *

Much later I had a very nice conversation with a fellow zombie. Until he brought politics into it, and when I said I disagreed with him as a democrat he said "FUCK YOU!" and I disconnected.

Spring break is over man =(
~Jess the Nerdfighting Band Geek

Still

You Vs. Your Parents

I consider myself an alien in comparison to my parents. I mean, ignore the extremely Finnish face when there are no glasses, the glasses, the green eyes, and the Mormon nose. And perhaps take into account that I emulate my father in musical taste to an extent, and that I've known since almost day one that I wanted to be a teacher (my mommy has worked in the day care business for a very long time). And fine, I might give you that I politically lean the same way as my parents (left side). BUT WE ARE COMPLETELY DIFFERENT.

My dad gets annoyed with little things about me like my fingernails. He hates that I wont clip them or file them, because I simply see no point. He says it's a bad reflection on him if I go out looking the way I do. May I please point you to the slutty girls at school, or the boys who all are showing off their boxers to the world. I am tame. Very tame. I reflect well on you by my personality. I think the only teacher I have that doesn't like me is my Chem teacher, and well really, I don't like her either so fair is fair.

My mother wants me to wear makeup, wear a bra instead of a cami, and basically become her vision of a girl. Which I find simply ridiculous. I don't really care about all these little things she wants. Clothes cost money, makeup costs money. Makeup takes away a load of time that I could use on the internet. And just throwing on jeans and a teeshirt means I don't have to worry about matching anything.

I really think I am different from my parents. Until I again notice the little things. We all are computer junkies. Steak must be on the rare side.

So I just left this for about an hour. Basically I still have no clue.
~Jess the Nerdfighting Band Geek