Update on my life. Cuz this is a blog, and you do stuff like that on these.
Right, homecoming week was kind of crazy, but overall it was completely fun and awesome, and I will have memories of this week for a long time. However, I was also glad on Sunday to get my day of recovery from all the crazyness. Same goes for this week: looking forward to nothing crazier than band. And band craziness doesn't ever wear me out, so it's all good.
Yeah, I have jazz band tonight, we finished setting drill today, have an extra rehearsal Wednesday night, and go to our first competition this Sunday. If I didn't love band, I might kill myself from self induced stress. But luckily, I love band, even if I have to play trombone =P
Every once in a while, I forget why I tell people I want to be a band director. I almost feel like I've locked myself in. But then we have weeks where everything gets serious, and I really sit down to work, where it all clicks. I am a musician, and I want to share every little bit of knowledge I have to a future generation of band geeks. These are the weeks that tend to bring everyone else down, but I thrive on. In some ways, it makes me miss spring time in Hawaii (particularly freshman year), where you have lessons, and jazz band, and honor band, and youth symphony, and select band, and small ensemble, and end of year concerts sucking up almost every free moment of your life. I love the spring in that manner. It's like a musical rebirth.
I also love math, and writing. Which is why despite having a decent amount of homework to fit in before jazz band, and to have to do during Monday night tv, I don't feel stressed or angered or anything. I fell well enough to sit down and say, hey, things are going good.
Talk to me next week and I will probably be stressed again >_<
Now I'm gonna go, because the essay and the math await. But first I wanna ask if you have anything like band is for me? Where sometimes you forget why you love it, until it's all your life is and you remember why. I'm curious.
And that is it for now!
~Jess the Nerdfighting BandGeek
PS: I have to write a commonplace assignment on Autumn that I think I might post here. So look for that sometime this week.
PPS: I'm reading Things Not Seen by Andrew Clements, it's absolutely amazing if you're looking for a book recommendation. (see: why I love getting 40% off coupons in my email).
Monday, September 27, 2010
Thursday, September 23, 2010
A Home
Where is my home?
In a span of 15 years, I have lived in five different countries/states, seven towns, and eight different houses. How are you supposed to pick the one place to be your hometown when you have that many options. When I go to college, where am I supposed to say my hometown is?
If it's where I was first born, then I am native to Bremerton, WA, a place I can only ever remember being in when we visited friends who lived there when we lived in Washington the second time. If it is where I spent the most time living, it is Glenview. If it's where I had the largest group of close friends, it's Hawaii. If it's where I grew up, well I'm not even entirely sure I have even grown up yet.
My home can't be where my heart is either, because my heart is even more conflicted in location. I have friends in Japan, Hawaii, Washington, California, Texas, Georgia, Ohio, New Mexico, Illinois, North Carolina, Germany, England, and probably other places I'm not aware of.
My home can't be where my family is. Because then my home is Utah, California, Illinois, England, and Finland. And sure, you could go by where my parents are only, but I think that would be ignoring the fact that outside of my direct family, I have been blessed with a multitude of loving people.
I suppose in the end, I might as well just say my home is anywhere you could imagine I'd be. Imagine I could end up in South Korea? I could, or a friend could and take me with them. Maybe, in a sense, our hometown is not anywhere we have been yet, but the place we make our peace with the world and settle down into a community, while maintaining our connections around the world.
Maybe it'd just be simpler if I said I'm from Nerdfighteria xD
~Jess the Nerdfighting BandGeek
In a span of 15 years, I have lived in five different countries/states, seven towns, and eight different houses. How are you supposed to pick the one place to be your hometown when you have that many options. When I go to college, where am I supposed to say my hometown is?
If it's where I was first born, then I am native to Bremerton, WA, a place I can only ever remember being in when we visited friends who lived there when we lived in Washington the second time. If it is where I spent the most time living, it is Glenview. If it's where I had the largest group of close friends, it's Hawaii. If it's where I grew up, well I'm not even entirely sure I have even grown up yet.
My home can't be where my heart is either, because my heart is even more conflicted in location. I have friends in Japan, Hawaii, Washington, California, Texas, Georgia, Ohio, New Mexico, Illinois, North Carolina, Germany, England, and probably other places I'm not aware of.
My home can't be where my family is. Because then my home is Utah, California, Illinois, England, and Finland. And sure, you could go by where my parents are only, but I think that would be ignoring the fact that outside of my direct family, I have been blessed with a multitude of loving people.
I suppose in the end, I might as well just say my home is anywhere you could imagine I'd be. Imagine I could end up in South Korea? I could, or a friend could and take me with them. Maybe, in a sense, our hometown is not anywhere we have been yet, but the place we make our peace with the world and settle down into a community, while maintaining our connections around the world.
Maybe it'd just be simpler if I said I'm from Nerdfighteria xD
~Jess the Nerdfighting BandGeek
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
Randomawesomesauce
Heeeeeey.
Haven't done one of these in a bit, and things told me it was time.
How are you?
I myself am pretty good.
I have a purple dress for homecoming. IT IS MADE OF AWESOME! I will post a piccy on Saturday with me wearing it. I told my date that it is the only picture he will ever get (see: doesn't like getting their picture taken, yet sits in front of a video camera far too frequently).
Do you like cookies? Here, have a cookie from my school's cafeteria *hands over most amazing cookie in the world that costs $1* Delicious, yes?
It just occured to me that I didn't tell you the kicker. I'm wearing sparkly pink shoes with my dress. Courtney (see: compared me to the gilmore girls and it completely made of awesome), was all like "NO WAY" (see: does not normally wear sparkles, or pink).
Speaking of pink, tomorrow is class color day, and that is the Junior class's color. I am wearing a tie die shirt that was originally blue and red (actually, it was originally covered in sigs from a theater group that came to my elementary school and did little orphan annie), but has mostly turned pink since then. Oh, if you're wondering, I've had the shirt since 2nd or 3rd grade, and it was tie dyed the summer after 4th grade. It used to be rather large on me, and it still is =)
Question: How do you dress up for superhero day if you own no superhero items? I was considering being mario, but then I realized I don't have any overalls, or a plunger that has not been used in a toilet or decapitated for musical purposes. Or a red hat.
Another Question: I write on my hand every day during my last class so that I grab all of the books I need from my locker everyday. Does anyone else do the same, or something simular? I don't mean using an assignment notebook, because I create this daily handwriting (see: punny) based on my assignment notebook.
So in conclusion, please answer the following questions in a comment (I said please because you don't have to. I don't yet know how to make the imperius curse work over the internet, so for now I'm going for politeness):
1) How are you?
2) Do you like cookies?
3) Delicious, yes?
4) What should I do for superhero day?
5) Do you handwrite? (again, see: punny)
~Jess the Nerdfighting BandGeek
PS: Link 1
PPS: Link 2
Haven't done one of these in a bit, and things told me it was time.
How are you?
I myself am pretty good.
I have a purple dress for homecoming. IT IS MADE OF AWESOME! I will post a piccy on Saturday with me wearing it. I told my date that it is the only picture he will ever get (see: doesn't like getting their picture taken, yet sits in front of a video camera far too frequently).
Do you like cookies? Here, have a cookie from my school's cafeteria *hands over most amazing cookie in the world that costs $1* Delicious, yes?
It just occured to me that I didn't tell you the kicker. I'm wearing sparkly pink shoes with my dress. Courtney (see: compared me to the gilmore girls and it completely made of awesome), was all like "NO WAY" (see: does not normally wear sparkles, or pink).
Speaking of pink, tomorrow is class color day, and that is the Junior class's color. I am wearing a tie die shirt that was originally blue and red (actually, it was originally covered in sigs from a theater group that came to my elementary school and did little orphan annie), but has mostly turned pink since then. Oh, if you're wondering, I've had the shirt since 2nd or 3rd grade, and it was tie dyed the summer after 4th grade. It used to be rather large on me, and it still is =)
Question: How do you dress up for superhero day if you own no superhero items? I was considering being mario, but then I realized I don't have any overalls, or a plunger that has not been used in a toilet or decapitated for musical purposes. Or a red hat.
Another Question: I write on my hand every day during my last class so that I grab all of the books I need from my locker everyday. Does anyone else do the same, or something simular? I don't mean using an assignment notebook, because I create this daily handwriting (see: punny) based on my assignment notebook.
So in conclusion, please answer the following questions in a comment (I said please because you don't have to. I don't yet know how to make the imperius curse work over the internet, so for now I'm going for politeness):
1) How are you?
2) Do you like cookies?
3) Delicious, yes?
4) What should I do for superhero day?
5) Do you handwrite? (again, see: punny)
~Jess the Nerdfighting BandGeek
PS: Link 1
PPS: Link 2
Thursday, September 16, 2010
AAAAAHHH
Why am I writing this right now? I am an idiot super procrastinator!
No. But seriously, why I have no idea why I just opened this link, but obviously my hands were telling me I need to write something. AAAAAHHH
Ok, see, my school is stupid, and they're having a football game on a THURSDAY. So my call time for band is at six, and I will probably get home around ten. I also have to do an english worksheet (I may put this off until study hall tomorrow), some history (part of which may end up put off until my lunch tomorrow), and then I need to study for French (and when I said need, I meant need. If I don't study I will fail so badly). I did my math homework during history class. Most of it anyways. Two problems I need to look through my notes for.
So yes, I am here to tell you I am crazy panicked. I suppose my hands know that days like these are the ones you need to record, because they are the most filled with life. If only there was enough time for all that life!
Right, so I'm going.
~Jess the Nerdfighting BandGeek
PS: For those in the know, I am doing it tonight. I wrote out two notes, and I will be standing there while it happens. *is extremely nervous*
No. But seriously, why I have no idea why I just opened this link, but obviously my hands were telling me I need to write something. AAAAAHHH
Ok, see, my school is stupid, and they're having a football game on a THURSDAY. So my call time for band is at six, and I will probably get home around ten. I also have to do an english worksheet (I may put this off until study hall tomorrow), some history (part of which may end up put off until my lunch tomorrow), and then I need to study for French (and when I said need, I meant need. If I don't study I will fail so badly). I did my math homework during history class. Most of it anyways. Two problems I need to look through my notes for.
So yes, I am here to tell you I am crazy panicked. I suppose my hands know that days like these are the ones you need to record, because they are the most filled with life. If only there was enough time for all that life!
Right, so I'm going.
~Jess the Nerdfighting BandGeek
PS: For those in the know, I am doing it tonight. I wrote out two notes, and I will be standing there while it happens. *is extremely nervous*
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
Bravery
The things you can't measure tend to be the things that matter most.
In a lot of situations, I turn into chicken shit. There is a bee near me? First instinct is to stay still, second instinct is to run away as fast as possible. Unexpected thing suddenly touches me? Jump up in intense panic. Audition? Talk myself down, and become extremely nervous.
I don't mean to be this way, it just happens. Instinctively, my body goes for the flight of fight or flight response. My brain shuts down. For other people, these things are no big deal, just a fact of life, and they don't freak out. These are the people who in my mind, probably wouldn't flinch if they met a dragon on a walk through the city.
But does that make them brave?
I strongly believe that bravery finds its roots in fear. And no matter if you seem to be the person who could face down a dragon, we all have a breaking point where things scare us. Fear is human.
I could never face a dragon, but I think I can still be just as brave as someone who could face a dragon. The effort it takes that person to face a dragon, is quite possibly the effort it takes for me to face a bee. And no matter how insignificant your fear may be, the effort you put into overcoming it, that is how brave you are.
In some ways, I would even say I am far braver than the person who can face a dragon. Because how often are you going to face a dragon compared to a bee?
I am highly fearful, but I am brave.
I am Gryffindor.
~Jess the Nerdfighting BandGeek
PS: Basically this is the first of four things I am going to do on how I belong in all of the four houses, and how really, houses don't matter, because everyone is everything. Basically I'm using Harry Potter to practice writing essays for English.
PPS: I'm getting my first essay back from English, and once I go through and edit it again, I will post it on here. It's about the internet and social networking from a more human perspective... I think... Whatever it's about, I think it will be good for posting after another edit.
In a lot of situations, I turn into chicken shit. There is a bee near me? First instinct is to stay still, second instinct is to run away as fast as possible. Unexpected thing suddenly touches me? Jump up in intense panic. Audition? Talk myself down, and become extremely nervous.
I don't mean to be this way, it just happens. Instinctively, my body goes for the flight of fight or flight response. My brain shuts down. For other people, these things are no big deal, just a fact of life, and they don't freak out. These are the people who in my mind, probably wouldn't flinch if they met a dragon on a walk through the city.
But does that make them brave?
I strongly believe that bravery finds its roots in fear. And no matter if you seem to be the person who could face down a dragon, we all have a breaking point where things scare us. Fear is human.
I could never face a dragon, but I think I can still be just as brave as someone who could face a dragon. The effort it takes that person to face a dragon, is quite possibly the effort it takes for me to face a bee. And no matter how insignificant your fear may be, the effort you put into overcoming it, that is how brave you are.
In some ways, I would even say I am far braver than the person who can face a dragon. Because how often are you going to face a dragon compared to a bee?
I am highly fearful, but I am brave.
I am Gryffindor.
~Jess the Nerdfighting BandGeek
PS: Basically this is the first of four things I am going to do on how I belong in all of the four houses, and how really, houses don't matter, because everyone is everything. Basically I'm using Harry Potter to practice writing essays for English.
PPS: I'm getting my first essay back from English, and once I go through and edit it again, I will post it on here. It's about the internet and social networking from a more human perspective... I think... Whatever it's about, I think it will be good for posting after another edit.
Sunday, September 12, 2010
The Moment
The ability to live in the moment is long gone.
I think this highly occurred to me because I’ve started driving. Because as I’m driving home (which is the only time thus far I get on the actual street), I realize that you can’t take a second to do anything while you do it. You have to focus on the road, focus on the cars, focus on the signs, and focus on the pedestrians. You can’t simply look over for a second when you see something interesting. There is no stopping to smell the roses. You’ve already driven past them by the time you’ve considered anything.
Outside of the realm of driving, you might be doing one thing, but your mind is wandering off, thinking of what you’re going to do, or reminiscing about something, or daydreaming, and you completely miss everything that’s just happened. Or maybe you paid attention, but a little piece of your mind still wasn’t entirely there.
I mean, it’s gotten to the point where a lot of families don’t even sit down to eat together. They scarf everything down in front of the tv, or everyone just goes off into their own worlds, or everyone just eats when they feel like it. Eating dinner with your family has to be one of the most exemplary ways to live in the moment. Delicious foods (or not so delicious ones) ensnare your senses; family members have a conversation without finding the need to talk over each other. People smile, and laugh, and love.
But then everything goes back to normal in a near instant, and family members drift into their own world away from the rest of the family. People do their own things, and go back to focusing on things they aren’t doing.
I think children, perhaps not this generation of children in particular, but children in general, they know how to stop and smell the roses. If something is interesting they go after it. When playing with friends, a child is ensnared in their imagination, not in the realm of tomorrow or yesterday. They forgive and forget with ease, because now is what matters.
Getting back to my separation of this generation of children from the rest. Earlier and earlier we are forced to grow up, and stop living in the moment. Second graders learn multiplication. Nine year olds have cell phones that they text on constantly. Gossip begins earlier, leading people away from the moment of reality. And it’s all disappearing.
It’s time to stop and smell the roses. It’s time to bring back the moment. It’s time to relax. It’s time get away from the technology draining our life away. It’s time to focus on our loved ones.
It’s time to live again.
~Jess the Nerdfighting BandGeek
PS: Slightly related to the begining, a bird pooped on me through the window while I was driving. It's just my luck really.
I think this highly occurred to me because I’ve started driving. Because as I’m driving home (which is the only time thus far I get on the actual street), I realize that you can’t take a second to do anything while you do it. You have to focus on the road, focus on the cars, focus on the signs, and focus on the pedestrians. You can’t simply look over for a second when you see something interesting. There is no stopping to smell the roses. You’ve already driven past them by the time you’ve considered anything.
Outside of the realm of driving, you might be doing one thing, but your mind is wandering off, thinking of what you’re going to do, or reminiscing about something, or daydreaming, and you completely miss everything that’s just happened. Or maybe you paid attention, but a little piece of your mind still wasn’t entirely there.
I mean, it’s gotten to the point where a lot of families don’t even sit down to eat together. They scarf everything down in front of the tv, or everyone just goes off into their own worlds, or everyone just eats when they feel like it. Eating dinner with your family has to be one of the most exemplary ways to live in the moment. Delicious foods (or not so delicious ones) ensnare your senses; family members have a conversation without finding the need to talk over each other. People smile, and laugh, and love.
But then everything goes back to normal in a near instant, and family members drift into their own world away from the rest of the family. People do their own things, and go back to focusing on things they aren’t doing.
I think children, perhaps not this generation of children in particular, but children in general, they know how to stop and smell the roses. If something is interesting they go after it. When playing with friends, a child is ensnared in their imagination, not in the realm of tomorrow or yesterday. They forgive and forget with ease, because now is what matters.
Getting back to my separation of this generation of children from the rest. Earlier and earlier we are forced to grow up, and stop living in the moment. Second graders learn multiplication. Nine year olds have cell phones that they text on constantly. Gossip begins earlier, leading people away from the moment of reality. And it’s all disappearing.
It’s time to stop and smell the roses. It’s time to bring back the moment. It’s time to relax. It’s time get away from the technology draining our life away. It’s time to focus on our loved ones.
It’s time to live again.
~Jess the Nerdfighting BandGeek
PS: Slightly related to the begining, a bird pooped on me through the window while I was driving. It's just my luck really.
Food and Homecoming.
I did all of my homework and cleaned my room before noon yesterday (saturday), leading to me having no idea what to do with myself. I mean, I still have some studying to do, but I basically have been free for 24 hours. It's simply amazing.
So yesterday we drove down to Chicago, and on the way back I realized that my school is right by this BP/McDonalds Combo that is right next to a Culver's. This is way awesome, because it increases my things to do after school with friends from just little ceasers, starbucks, baskin robins, and soon to be Chipotle (although I am SUPER excited about chipotle. No longer will there be driving for a half hour to get to my love <3 href="http://insanity-is-i.livejournal.com/2509.html">ode to burrito bowl, it's on my old livejournal]). So because of this relevation, I think that after school Friday I will find someone to hang out with at culver's before the game, and eat chili cheese fries and ice cream! (I've never tried chili cheese fries with ice cream, but I've dipped cheese fries into a malt at Johnny Rocket's. SO GOOD).
Oh, and homecoming is in two weeks, and I am going this time! Freshman year my friends and I figured it was a waste of money, and I think that as freshmen, it would have been. Sophomore year we had a band competition the same day. But this year I am going! And I might be bringing Maddy as my "date", she hasn't been to a homecoming yet either. But if not I'm pretty sure my freshmen friends are going, so I'd go with them. One of my friends was trying to tell me that guys ask random girls to these dances all the time (cuz he asked me if anyone had asked me, and I told him that considering he knew all the guys I knew, he would know), which is completely absurd to me, because this has never been my experience, has anyone else seen this?
But going to homecoming means buying my first formal anything ever. Because I've never been to a wedding, my middle school graduation was casual dress, and my previous high school only had Homecoming and Prom. So this will be an experience. My parents are teasing me about all of this as well. Yes yes, I'm growing up, and will leave you in two years, but really, I'd think you'd be happier with the fact that you won't have any kids in the house once you're 36 and 38. I don't think that's anything that happens that often.
Now I am going to go, because while I may have been in super work mode yesterday morning, I have yet to take a shower today, and I think I need one. And I probably should study.
~Jess the Nerdfighting BandGeek
So yesterday we drove down to Chicago, and on the way back I realized that my school is right by this BP/McDonalds Combo that is right next to a Culver's. This is way awesome, because it increases my things to do after school with friends from just little ceasers, starbucks, baskin robins, and soon to be Chipotle (although I am SUPER excited about chipotle. No longer will there be driving for a half hour to get to my love <3 href="http://insanity-is-i.livejournal.com/2509.html">ode to burrito bowl, it's on my old livejournal]). So because of this relevation, I think that after school Friday I will find someone to hang out with at culver's before the game, and eat chili cheese fries and ice cream! (I've never tried chili cheese fries with ice cream, but I've dipped cheese fries into a malt at Johnny Rocket's. SO GOOD).
Oh, and homecoming is in two weeks, and I am going this time! Freshman year my friends and I figured it was a waste of money, and I think that as freshmen, it would have been. Sophomore year we had a band competition the same day. But this year I am going! And I might be bringing Maddy as my "date", she hasn't been to a homecoming yet either. But if not I'm pretty sure my freshmen friends are going, so I'd go with them. One of my friends was trying to tell me that guys ask random girls to these dances all the time (cuz he asked me if anyone had asked me, and I told him that considering he knew all the guys I knew, he would know), which is completely absurd to me, because this has never been my experience, has anyone else seen this?
But going to homecoming means buying my first formal anything ever. Because I've never been to a wedding, my middle school graduation was casual dress, and my previous high school only had Homecoming and Prom. So this will be an experience. My parents are teasing me about all of this as well. Yes yes, I'm growing up, and will leave you in two years, but really, I'd think you'd be happier with the fact that you won't have any kids in the house once you're 36 and 38. I don't think that's anything that happens that often.
Now I am going to go, because while I may have been in super work mode yesterday morning, I have yet to take a shower today, and I think I need one. And I probably should study.
~Jess the Nerdfighting BandGeek
Monday, September 6, 2010
Oh Wow
I'm totally getting that feeling of falling. That wonderful, amazing, and terrifying feeling of falling. And I've never had it like this before. Oh wow.
I'm not gonna go anymore specific on that.
Other topics!
I'm trying to work on this whole motivation thing. I love being online and doing online things, but then I don't put that much effort into it. I think I could be semi-viable internet wise if I worked on that. I mean, I like making vlogs, and blogs, and writing fanfiction, and twittering, but it's all disconnected, and my effort is all off. One day I'll start a fanfiction with a ton of glorious plans, and never do anything more than write and post that first chapter. I got a camera for my birthday, and I've edited and posted a few sporadic vlogs, but that's not really doing anything. On this blog, I post a fair amount, but then it's usually just a life update, and I know I have so much more to talk about. I'm bright, and spirited, and I know I can do better. Twittering, I do it, none of my friends do it excluding one, so realistically I should make it a place to maintain friendships I make with people I meet online, but instead I use it to stalk Maureen Johnson. Oh yeah.
Also, motivation issues elsewhere in my life. History, I just don't care about European history now that I'm actually taking it, and I wish that I hadn't decided to take it. I want to either be a writer or a high school band director (I know this will work best if I get the degree in music education, and just keep writing). I have less than a year and a half to get ready for auditions, so I should really be practicing at least an hour a day, probably two if I really want to be competitive, and I do. Writing, I have two stories relatively planned, in my head, ready to go. One I sat down maybe three times to write spanning from an hour to three hours, and have slightly above 2,000 words on, but I really could have more. The other story hasn't even touched (e?)paper yet. I wanna be more fit, and decide I'd prefer that extra half hour of sleep.
I don't know how to get motivated at all. I always start things and never finish them. I know what I'm good at, and I don't work to get better. The lazy get left behind. I am the lazy.
This. Needs. To. Stop.
However, I am weak, or at least not good. I need help with this. Serious help, or I will get nowhere. So I'm asking for advice, and to be annoying and stuff if you can for me, because that would be amazingly helpful.
Also, to start on this internet connection thing: http://twitter.com/oceansurferg That is my twitter. Idk if you can do a message when you request to follow, but if not then just somehow get the word "yodel" across to me within a week or I will delete you.
Oh, and in less substantial news. I have been reading a lot. School gives me a lot of time to do that (particularly physics where I am so bored it's sad). But I need to recommend the book If I Stay by Gayle Forman for anyone musical in any way. If you sing, or rock out, or play the tuba ( =] ) or just really love and are amazed by music, this is an absolutely tragic book I want you to read. It speaks to the souls of music folk (nerd points if you get the reference).
I suppose this is a brownie point towards better blogging?
~Jess the Nerdfighting BandGeek
PS: Kaleidoscope Heart by Sara Bareilles is coming out tomorrow, and I probably won't be able to buy the cd until the begining of october, but I am so excited. I've been listening to King of Anything over and over again in preparation.
I'm not gonna go anymore specific on that.
Other topics!
I'm trying to work on this whole motivation thing. I love being online and doing online things, but then I don't put that much effort into it. I think I could be semi-viable internet wise if I worked on that. I mean, I like making vlogs, and blogs, and writing fanfiction, and twittering, but it's all disconnected, and my effort is all off. One day I'll start a fanfiction with a ton of glorious plans, and never do anything more than write and post that first chapter. I got a camera for my birthday, and I've edited and posted a few sporadic vlogs, but that's not really doing anything. On this blog, I post a fair amount, but then it's usually just a life update, and I know I have so much more to talk about. I'm bright, and spirited, and I know I can do better. Twittering, I do it, none of my friends do it excluding one, so realistically I should make it a place to maintain friendships I make with people I meet online, but instead I use it to stalk Maureen Johnson. Oh yeah.
Also, motivation issues elsewhere in my life. History, I just don't care about European history now that I'm actually taking it, and I wish that I hadn't decided to take it. I want to either be a writer or a high school band director (I know this will work best if I get the degree in music education, and just keep writing). I have less than a year and a half to get ready for auditions, so I should really be practicing at least an hour a day, probably two if I really want to be competitive, and I do. Writing, I have two stories relatively planned, in my head, ready to go. One I sat down maybe three times to write spanning from an hour to three hours, and have slightly above 2,000 words on, but I really could have more. The other story hasn't even touched (e?)paper yet. I wanna be more fit, and decide I'd prefer that extra half hour of sleep.
I don't know how to get motivated at all. I always start things and never finish them. I know what I'm good at, and I don't work to get better. The lazy get left behind. I am the lazy.
This. Needs. To. Stop.
However, I am weak, or at least not good. I need help with this. Serious help, or I will get nowhere. So I'm asking for advice, and to be annoying and stuff if you can for me, because that would be amazingly helpful.
Also, to start on this internet connection thing: http://twitter.com/oceansurferg That is my twitter. Idk if you can do a message when you request to follow, but if not then just somehow get the word "yodel" across to me within a week or I will delete you.
Oh, and in less substantial news. I have been reading a lot. School gives me a lot of time to do that (particularly physics where I am so bored it's sad). But I need to recommend the book If I Stay by Gayle Forman for anyone musical in any way. If you sing, or rock out, or play the tuba ( =] ) or just really love and are amazed by music, this is an absolutely tragic book I want you to read. It speaks to the souls of music folk (nerd points if you get the reference).
I suppose this is a brownie point towards better blogging?
~Jess the Nerdfighting BandGeek
PS: Kaleidoscope Heart by Sara Bareilles is coming out tomorrow, and I probably won't be able to buy the cd until the begining of october, but I am so excited. I've been listening to King of Anything over and over again in preparation.
Friday, September 3, 2010
Absolutely Scrap Week
Ah, so I have neglected this thingymabobber.
NOT ANYMORE!
Actually, still more, but you know... For today I won't be!
I've been completely overloaded with homework since for almost two weeks, until yesterday where I only had math homework. And since I had drivers' ed study hall for today, I didn't do it. I was sleeping instead (more later). But then today, I came home, and found I have almost no homework again. I mean, a bit more, because I technically need to be studying English because we got about 30 new vocab today that we will be tested on the monday after labor day.
So yesterday, I was absolutely sick. I was so pathetic, that I had to wear my jacket all day, because I kept going from being oh my god hot, to freezing cold. And so in French I didn't understand anything we did that day, could barely pay attention in drivers' ed, then I magically felt better for math and English, but then band I started to feel like crap again. By the time it was history, I felt so bad that I ended up bombing my History test. So when I eventually got home, I was just being sick in my parent's room with their tv, then falling asleep for a bit in my room, eating, then going to bed for the night around seven.
Now onto today: today was freezing. That is all I think I will remember about today besides band. Absolutely freezing. And I am wearing a skirt, because I'm out of pants, which really dosen't help whatsoever. And then the other highlight of today has been band. See, tonight is our first home game, and the band's first preformance, and we FAILED at marching our second song. EPIC FAILURE. But things got fixed, and hopefully will stick. No, but my friend and I are kinda mad cuz we specifically got yelled at a lot. Him because having not been here the day we learned the charts, he's still trying to get things down. Then I am one of the people who is supposed to lead us off the field and no one explained it properly, so I just looked like a complete idiot for something that WASN'T MY FAULT. Then I accidentally left my binder outside and someone stole it. Because of this, I bought myself the $2 pudding my school has. It was completely worth it, because that just sucked, and I needed a pick me up.
I think the main issue, is they pushed everything way too fast. We've known our charts for Vehicle only two days of marching, and they got mad at us for not having everything down. Unlike my old school, absolutely no time is spent working on music in any way that helps at all. I miss having the Marine band over to help us out all the time, they worked miracles. And then I hate how we've only had about three weeks to work on all this, and we're marching already. My old school worked for almost two months before our first show for the same amount to be preformed. And I don't like marching with a lyre, because I'm getting to reliant on it, where as at my old school we would have had every bit memorized. It's all just insane here.
So yeah, I have to be at school in about an hour. I can't *wait* for my doom.
(If you didn't notice, sarcasm was heavily implied. Don't worry, I'm not insane).
~Jess the Nerdfighting BandGeek
PS: After this I get to write a blog post to my friend. My life is a blog blogger!
NOT ANYMORE!
Actually, still more, but you know... For today I won't be!
I've been completely overloaded with homework since for almost two weeks, until yesterday where I only had math homework. And since I had drivers' ed study hall for today, I didn't do it. I was sleeping instead (more later). But then today, I came home, and found I have almost no homework again. I mean, a bit more, because I technically need to be studying English because we got about 30 new vocab today that we will be tested on the monday after labor day.
So yesterday, I was absolutely sick. I was so pathetic, that I had to wear my jacket all day, because I kept going from being oh my god hot, to freezing cold. And so in French I didn't understand anything we did that day, could barely pay attention in drivers' ed, then I magically felt better for math and English, but then band I started to feel like crap again. By the time it was history, I felt so bad that I ended up bombing my History test. So when I eventually got home, I was just being sick in my parent's room with their tv, then falling asleep for a bit in my room, eating, then going to bed for the night around seven.
Now onto today: today was freezing. That is all I think I will remember about today besides band. Absolutely freezing. And I am wearing a skirt, because I'm out of pants, which really dosen't help whatsoever. And then the other highlight of today has been band. See, tonight is our first home game, and the band's first preformance, and we FAILED at marching our second song. EPIC FAILURE. But things got fixed, and hopefully will stick. No, but my friend and I are kinda mad cuz we specifically got yelled at a lot. Him because having not been here the day we learned the charts, he's still trying to get things down. Then I am one of the people who is supposed to lead us off the field and no one explained it properly, so I just looked like a complete idiot for something that WASN'T MY FAULT. Then I accidentally left my binder outside and someone stole it. Because of this, I bought myself the $2 pudding my school has. It was completely worth it, because that just sucked, and I needed a pick me up.
I think the main issue, is they pushed everything way too fast. We've known our charts for Vehicle only two days of marching, and they got mad at us for not having everything down. Unlike my old school, absolutely no time is spent working on music in any way that helps at all. I miss having the Marine band over to help us out all the time, they worked miracles. And then I hate how we've only had about three weeks to work on all this, and we're marching already. My old school worked for almost two months before our first show for the same amount to be preformed. And I don't like marching with a lyre, because I'm getting to reliant on it, where as at my old school we would have had every bit memorized. It's all just insane here.
So yeah, I have to be at school in about an hour. I can't *wait* for my doom.
(If you didn't notice, sarcasm was heavily implied. Don't worry, I'm not insane).
~Jess the Nerdfighting BandGeek
PS: After this I get to write a blog post to my friend. My life is a blog blogger!
